I'm Back - ON WRITING AND RUNNING

I'm back to being where I was before I got away
it's hard for me to remember just where I am today
at least I think I once was there but now I'm not so sure
the past is rather muddled, the future is manure
my sanity's in question, my brain is in decline
things seem to go so well in little spurts of time
my attitude is such that I'm something less than whole
but then I find it's just a dream, no longer in control
i've been deceived by my own ego, a cruel ironic twist
thinking I had something which is easily dismissed
i no longer can communicate with simple clarity
i'm idiot-synchratic laced with peculiarity
my age is now a testament to stubbornness and grief
I'm out of touch with reality, just in need of some relief
I no longer have any faith in completing any task
I'm looking for some answers but don't know who to ask